How to Speak With Confidence – Review of The Charisma Matrix14 minute read

• Quick Note: As usual with these reviews, I have not being paid to write this review. I wrote this review because I got results with what Barron Cruz over on Charisma Matrix advises! Advice on how to speak with power and authority and you will too!
• He has some great stuff centered around your voice to instill confidence in yourself through some simple confidence-building activities.
• It’s time to make your voice powerful so that people snap to attention! I’ve seen results (that story is here) and so will you
• IMPORTANT LAST NOTE READ THIS. When we talk about how to get a powerful voice in this article to become self-assured we’re talking about unlocking what’s naturally there. Not how to make your voice deeper permanently (it’ll damage your vocal chords). Because chances are your natural voice is fine. But what happens is people speak higher pitched than normal. Which can damage your voice
• That’s what we’re going to cover in this article. How to get a deeper voice naturally and how to strengthen your voice by unlocking what’s already there. We need to shake off some bad habits and get you speaking with confidence. Confidence that will help you command power and respect. Confidence that will help you learn how to feel better about yourself and your voice to become a confident person!

Have you ever been talking to a potential customer, friend or even a stranger and they seemed to ignore you? They might not have been rude, but you could tell that they weren’t paying attention or even respecting your time. Or perhaps they were outright disrespectful to you? It might be because nobody ever taught you how to speak with confidence and authority with a voice that commands respect. You’ll realize that if you want to exude confidence naturally and get your target market paying attention to you, your voice is what will allow you to come across confidently and charismatically to people.

That way you can convert more of your leads into sales just by working on your voice! Which is what we’re going to focus on in this article. You’re going to learn how to appear more confident in a way most people don’t think to work on. All thanks to Barron Cruz on the Charisma Matrix and his simple confidence building exercises.

Speaking With Confidence In a Way That People Instantly Respect

• Click the link in the title to go straight to the video

Everything in this article will come back to one thing: your tonality. Because nothing will build high self-esteem and self-respect like speaking with a powerful voice. But you’ll only be able to speak with power and confidence after you work on your tonality. It’s EXTREMELY important! Which is why we’re going to focus first on the video above.

One thing I love about this video is how it starts. It starts with an old clip of Barron from years ago. Before he learned the very tips he goes over in the video that we will cover!

That way, you can see the differences a few years can make with this simple confidence-building activity!

In this video Barron covers the three different types of tonality:

1. Rapport Seeking
2. Then Rapport Neutral
3. And Rapport Breaking

Rapport Seeking

This is the tone that people use without even knowing it (which was even the same of me!) This is the tone that people will use with someone that they think is higher status than they are. And it’s also something that a lot of freelancers, entrepreneurs and people in customer service can relate to. Something I call it the “customer service” voice.

This unconsciously happens when we want people to like us. However, doing this kills our status in the process which makes people tune out what we’re saying. Which, as you’ll no doubt have experienced, doesn’t do well when you’re trying to convert people into loyal customers. Loyal customers are loyal because they respect who they’re working with. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t ever use rapport-seeking tonality. Rapport-seeking tonality does have its uses (one of which we’ll cover in the next section). It also happens to have a lot of cons.

What Constant Rapport Seeking Tonality Does to You

• You feel lower in social status (even if you actually have higher status)
  • This causes you to feel worse about yourself which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy
  • Leads to fidgeting, which makes you more anxious and corrupts your confidence even more
  • Potential leads start to tune you out and respect you and your business less. Even if they honestly need what you have
• Other people annoyingly assert themselves above you and treat you like dog shit
• Women will not be as attracted to you as they otherwise could be

Instead, adopt a combination of the next two tonalities that Barron will cover. We don’t have enough room to cover everything in his video, so check it out. He shows you some easy-to-follow examples on how to make your voice more powerful and instill confidence in yourself. Here’s the link again so you don’t have to scroll up for this simple confidence building activity. Once you’ve gone over that short video, you’ll be able to introduce yourself in a way that generates respect immediately:

How to Confidently Introduce Yourself in a Powerful Way To Convert More Leads

The first video of Barron’s is crucial because it covers the three different tonalities. The next, however, is how to introduce yourself confidently in a way that allows you to honestly and utterly present yourself in a high-status and dominant way to help convert more leads into sales. You’ll notice that high-status people don’t get ignored precisely because they know how to appear confident and speak in a self-assured way which leads to people respecting their opinions, which leads to more sales!

But, in order to introduce yourself dominantly and confidently, you need to have control over your tonalities.

How to Speak With Confidence: The High-Status Introduction

• Click the title to go to the video

In this 5-minute clip Barron shows you how to introduce yourself in a way that people will respect. Coming back to the three tonalities again:

1. Seeking
2. Neutral
3. Breaking

There are good and bad things about all three tonalities.

The first, rapport seeking, will help you seem friendlier, although weaker.

The second is rapport-breaking tonality, which helps to generate respect and exude confidence. The people who constantly use it, however, risk coming off like a dick. For example, imagine a police officer pulling you over and then trying to sell you something. How weird is that?

Meanwhile, the neutral tonality is in the middle. It doesn’t hurt you too much but it doesn’t help you a ton either. This is key to know before going into Barron’s next video. In the next video, we’re going to mix all three tonalities together to get the best possible bang for our buck! That way you can figure out how to feel better about yourself with these simple confidence-building activities 🙂

How to Appear Confident Using All Three Tonalities:

Whenever you introduce yourself, the actual words you use don’t matter much. As long as it’s not way out of left field like “Fuck you! My name’s Alexander”. Something I saw somebody do once to prove that words do matter like that wasn’t obvious. Like all advice in all the world; please exercise common sense. People like a confident person but they don’t like genuine assholes nor do they want to work with them.

Anyway, that short common-sense disclaimer out of the way here’s the words you use. Although substitute my name for yours:

“Hey there, my name is Alexander Pendragon”

Those are the actual words, but let’s break down the tonalities we mix together.

Hey there

Said in a rapport seeking tonality, a step above neutral tonality. Then, you immediately downshift into neutral tonality with:

My name

Before finally ending in a rapport-breaking tonality with:

is Alexander Pendragon

Why is That Speaking With Confidence?

In this introduction and simple confidence building exercise to instill confidence in ourselves, we are doing a few different things. We start off with a wondrously warm rapport-seeking voice. Because it’s an easy way to automatically and sincerely come across as charismatic and friendly because that’s going to help you expand your abilities in getting what you want authentically and naturally. Which means converting more people into long-term clients.

After the rapport-seeking tonality, we immediately go into neutral tonality before hitting rapport breaking. The reason we need rapport-neutral is so that the shift isn’t so abrupt that you scare people off. It’ll sound weird if you go rapport-seeking into rapport-breaking. You’ll come off as autistic, or even as a clown because it’s too big of a jump. It’s not normal. Yet, we need to end with rapport breaking. We do this because that’s the one comes across as higher status and helps us appear confident and powerful.

The Effect We Want

Putting it together subconsciously, the effect we are going for is this:

‘Friendly’ into ‘the transition’ and ending with ‘strong and almost prideful’. This is how you exude confidence and learn how to appear confident to other people and potential clients

That’s because people aren’t going to introduce themselves this way unless they respect themselves, hence ‘speaking with confidence’.

In other words; speaking with confidence like this conveys social power. Men and women alike respect and admire power. Men will follow your lead and will want to be your friend when you convey higher status. You’ll be invited out to more events and people will stick up for you if shit hits the fan. But that’s in your personal relationships. In your professional ones you’ll get more trust as well as respect. This is a big reason why a lot of people listen to what celebrities say. It’s also a big part of how con men are able to scheme people out of their money. Although we’ll be doing this ethically by giving people a solid product.

Next up is how to strengthen your voice and how to speak with confidence.

Because you can have great tonality while still having a weak voice. And if you’ve ever asked ‘how to make my voice deeper then this is the video for you:

How to Strengthen Your Voice and Speak With Power and Confidence

• Click the title to go to the video

The above video covers the body language behind the voice you want. Which is also called ‘honest signals‘, something we explore a lot in the confidence-building workshop you can access here. Even if you have a great voice you can still come across as weak if you don’t stand behind your words. For more tips on posture than we’ll cover here, check out either of these articles:

• How to Stand Like Superman
  • Shorter article
• The Ultimate Guide to Posture and Feeling Powerful
  • More in-depth

But back to the video breakdown:

The first tip in this video is to STOP SLOUCHING. For one, it murders the force and power that you can put into your words and voice. The reason is that it stops you from breathing in as deeply as you could and should. Remember, breath is to the voice what a skeleton is to the body, it’s the foundation.

For two, it also looks bad in front of potential clients.

And three, it comes across as unconfident and almost conniving. When someone slouches they come off like they want something from you. But are too scared to come out and tell you what they want. Which, naturally is the exact opposite way you want to appear.

How to Speak With Confidence: Project Your Voice to Be Heard

Barron has such a great example from his video I have to use it here:

However, because James speaks to be heard he has become THE MAN of men when it comes to voices. Another great example of this is Morgan Freeman. There are some hilarious comments I’ve heard that go something like this:

“Morgan Freeman could tell me that he was about to murder my entire family and I would feel completely relaxed”

Now, I hope it’s obvious that it’s an exaggeration, but it’s not that far from the truth! Another comment that people with a great voice will get:

That man could read the dictionary to me and I would listen all the way to the end

But!

But NONE of that will happen unless you speak to be heard! When reading that, it sounds like one of those “well, duh” statements. But this is something that I myself used to be guilty of! And it’s something that I see other people do every day! It’s like they’re too afraid to be heard which ends up getting them ignored.

Just imagine how many sales these people are missing out on because they don’t speak to be heard…

Other Confidence Building Exercises in The Video on How to Make Your Voice Deeper

Barron has some other tips in this video (linked here again for easy access) that are gold.

This article is already getting long, so we won’t cover them here so definitely make sure to check it out. It’s only about six minutes long and there’s still one final video of his we need to go over:

How to Speak With Confidence and Authority: Attract Women and Intimidate Men

• Click the title to go straight to the video

This video is on the longer side, clocking in at around 14 minutes. However, we are ending on this one because it takes the tips we’ve already gone over and gives more examples.

How to Speak With Confidence

In the beginning, he talks about what stress does to your voice. As well as how to notice and then ferociously fight it. But before you can fight it, you have to notice it. One way to notice stress and tension in your body is to think about your shoulders. Are they nice and loose or do you raise them up causing stress to form?

Stress that will absolutely cripple the confidence you feel and the confidence you project out into the world. Which in turn cripples what you can do in both your professional and personal lives.

So when you notice that your shoulders are tensed up; shake them loose until they’re relaxed. Try to relax them and go about your day. That way, you can release some of the tension in your body. Repeat this exercise for any part of the body that you carry stress in.

Releasing Tension in Your Throat to Build High Self Esteem

But another common one is your throat and is the one that crushes your voice. Whenever you carry stress in your neck and throat, you will speak in a higher-pitched tone.

In addition, if you’re like me, you’ll notice that you’re speaking faster. Almost struggling to get the words out, which is different than when you’re excited and passionate. When you’re passionate you naturally breathe more and can easily put power into your words which helps you exude confidence. But when you’re struggling to get the words it’s easy to try to do it in a single breath.

When this happens; take a moment to take a breath and Slow. It. Down. It takes some getting used to at first, but slow it down and speak in a more controlled, deliberate manner.

Other Tips on How to Speak With Confidence:

I don’t want to spoil everything in the video that Barron has, so make sure to check it out.

Here are a few more things that he covers in it:

• What to do whenever someone is actively disrespecting you or being rude to you
• Some body-language tips so that you don’t scare people off or come across as too weak and afraid
• More tips on how to come across as someone who demands respect

My Experience With Barron’s Tips on How Speak With Power and Confidence

For that story as well as learning how to appear confident and stand up for yourself, check out the article linked in the heading! Because you’ll notice and realize that learning how to exude confidence and stand up for yourself is an invaluable life skill you’ll want to have! Alternatively, you can check out my free confidence building workshop here. That will help you become a confident person with some simple confidence building exercises 🙂

Keep Moving Forward
-Alexander

Quick Note: If you’d like to get some easy-to-use vocal tonality tips and tricks, then schedule a time to talk with me here. It’s free as long as you promise to send a testimonial after 🙂

How to Exude Confidence Through Your Voice Re-Cap